Weightless

Words - thoughts - and ideas come into my head, and often I write the revelation down. This blog post is one the holy spirit has been hinting to me at. The process came when I dove into the water casting my work week aside to be refreshed. As I dive down I hear the Father speak this phrase to me, weightless - this is who you are. As I get this thought in my head I feel the connection. I was created to be weightless due to the cost Christ paid for. Which results in His endless grace He has for us. The burdens I've placed upon myself end up ripping Jesus from His full reward. When I allow God to fully take captive of my life, I allow the Holy Spirit to move in my life. 

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What causes weight in my life? As I ponder a daily (reality) struggle of mine is fighting insecurity. This territory is a real issue fighting off the thoughts of others and myself. When I dwell in this state of mind I allow fiery darts of the enemy, feeding me lie after lie. Festering on this issue of insecurity builds up a false identity towards myself. Leaving me isolated concerning my emotions and resulting in self-condemnation. I often try to live up to the success of my good deeds without realizing it. Leaving my faith to be religious, dry, and dull. 

Where are the lies coming from and where is this root issue. To my discovery, I've let my worldview dictate my worth, value, and beauty. From the outside looking in I don't have everything together, most of the time I create a 'perfect' reality in my head. Filled with endless questions of 'IF I' 

"If I get the perfect job, I'll be successful."

"If I move to another state, I can move towards my goals."

"If I go out on the missions field, then God can use me."
 

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This state of mind is a turning hamster wheel, meaning there's no end to the possibilities. Getting stuck in this momentum is toxic, and hazardous to one's soul. At the end of the day, you and I were created to be weightless. The Father is wanting us to inhale courage, passion, and dreams. In exchange for exhaling fear, self-hatred, and doubt. To trade our yoke for his which easy and light. I find it best when I cast all my trouble upon the Lord I am weightless. I am weightless because Christ has paid the ultimate price.

Compassion

1: A feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.  2: A feeling of wanting to help someone who is sick, hungry, or in trouble. 

Compassion is the word the Lord has given me for 2016. Is it crazy that I can already see the effect this word has for me. As many of you know I currently nanny for 2 wonderful families. Now as of last month (December) I picked up another family to care for, let me tell you God's timing for this was perfect. During the last week of November I was looking for more work, acting upon it I updated my care.com profile. Within only 48 hours I received a message from Jaime seeking part time help! 

Yes we serve a amazing and f a i t h f u l God. Taking care of his kiddos like a good father.

Jaime + Aaron have 4 children. Zeke (five and a half) Quinn (Three) Zoey (One and a half) and Arie the newest addition. Each family is special to me, all with different mannerisms and personalities. Now to tie in the word compassion, both Aaron + Jaime have Lymes disease, its an illness that causes severe fatigue and most days the parents are lacking in energy and sleep. On top of the Lymes, Aaron also has a rare blood disease where his blood is filled with metal. My heart aches for this family and I truly see where I'm needed, to love on the children, care for them, and build relationships. Also to be a big help to the parents yet make a spiritual impact while serving them all. Join me to pray for this family, for God's love to break any physical + spiritual attacks against this family.  

 Disciple: Encourage and let God be the center of all things through the good, bad, and ugly. I constantly find myself interceding for this family. Praying for a miracle and healing to happen. My compassion is towards them, and towards showing them God's heart through me.

My passion is to feel the Father's heart. What's on God's heart? You and I of course! His love for each living soul is abundant. When I spend less time on me, and more time on others I feel Jesus, and I get a small glimpse of heaven and am reminded why I'm here on earth. I am to be a part of the great commission and for God's love to spread to the very ends of the earth. 

And surely I am with you always; to the very end of the age.
— Matthew 28:20


Home

Oh holy spirit come like a fire, all consuming, consume me
— Hillsong

Coming back to America, coming back to home has been h a r d. The hardest transition in my life. I see there's more to life then just the next best trend or the hottest juiciest gossip.I know the meaning of life and have seen it first hand. I'm called to love, to take up my cross. To minister to help the sick and befriend the needy. To be a better person than who I was yesterday. This challenge is something I must take up. I must take up my cross every day.  

I may be cursed at, looked down upon, and hated by many. 

But at the end of the day.. I know my maker. I hear his voice when he calls. Other times I search for him. I cry out for him and long to be near him. When I most know God is when I'm most in love with Him. When I drop everything to involve him.

It is times that I cannot hear him is when I grow. In trusting that He will provide for me and that he has a g l o r i o u s plan for my life. That plan started  23 years ago. I don't believe in a plan A, B, C. I believe God will always have plan A for my life. I'm the one that may take the looong way and from my mistakes God redirects me back on track. This journey I have embarked on just started. God has been using me in way I wouldn't of done before I left. Here's how.

T H A N K S G I V I N G

Give thanks unto the Lord; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever
— Psalm 136

Can you believe that the Holiday's are here.. again! Thanksgiving a time with family and yes loads of food. This year is a new year filled with new traditions. On the 20th we celebrated Thanksgiving with my moms side of the family. My aunt Debbie does a wonderful job hosting. Each of the kiddos were asked to prepare something festive. I was given the topic of the Holy Spirit. Now the fun starts.

Homemade pumpkin pie. Made by yours truly. 

Back in lecture phase when I was at the University of the Nations. This first week was on the topic of "Hearing God's Voice" (look back from my blogs in April). I was taught a 'game' I guess you'd call it. You confess any sin you haven't dealt with, slience the enemy, and trust God will speak to you. Because He does

About an hour before the party. Planning and praying about the how the night would go. I felt a heavy pain in my chest and a feeling of d o u b t came to mind. "This will be stupid, what if God doesn't speak, your family won't be interested". Complete lies from the enemy. I prayed and the pain left me. Let me tell you there is so much power in the name of J E S U S. Satan had other plans for the night because he knew something good was to come. 

After dinner we gathered for a time of fellowship. After reading a few verses about the Holy Spirit I taught the game to my family. After passing out pens and paper, I lead them into a time of prayer and allowed God to speak. I took my cousins hat and placed all the pieces of paper in the hat and had each person draw. That night God spoke to each person in the room. Break through happened and walls that were up c r u m b l e d down. AS a family we prayed over one another. We were real with one another. Raw moments. All because I obeyed God.

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I have a purpose back home even if its to impact one person. Hands down the best Thanksgiving I've had. From this act of obedience it changed the atmosphere. "We create a reality around us, according to the reality within us". The stuff I learned in lecture phase is applying to my life.. YES!

From this outcome changed my own immediate family and we had a wonderful turkey day. Spent down at the lake house. Are you willing to listen and obey the Lord when He speaks and calls? Let me tell you its so rewarding. When I step out of my comfort zone is where Jesus meets me.

F a c e | to | F a c e

Moju Morin (July 24th- 27th)

“Put on the full armor of God” -Ephesians 6:11

The white VW passenger bus pulls up and the adventure continues. Loaded both cars and off we went on a two hour drive to the village of Moju Mirin. This short trip was a challenge for all. We stayed in the communities local school which was all closed in (bathroom, kitchen, and shower). After talking to a few locals to figure out the dynamics of the village. We discovered that we (my team and I) were the first white foreigners in that village.

The VW wagons are a popular car in Brazil. Just last year (2014) the company stopped making the vans. 

Before arriving my school leaders (Philip and Lily Lin) flew into to see us. To have a one on one with each of us. The morning before arriving in the village we gather and prayed before heading out. The Lord highlighted some words, and visions. Each one with a different purpose and meaning, H O L Y|S P I R I T    The color orange, a word ‘rider’, turkeys, vision of a young man, and for me a vision of me telling the gospel to a house full of people! 

Day 1: A team of dental hygienist came and cleaned teeth at no charge. This gave wonderful opportunities for us. To build relationships and share the gospel. While the adults went first for the teeth cleaning the kids needed to be entertained. BB tash, Joy, and myself taught games and bible stories to the kiddos. While playing sheep, sheep, Shepard (duck, duck, goose) half the group of kids ran down to the swimming hole stripped down and jumped in! Following after joy and myself lived in the moment and joined. Fully clothed. Splashing around a girl by the name of Carol  l o v e d  me. How I miss the joys of being a kid..with no worries. Carol and I shared something special this little girl captured my heart from sharing laughs and giggles, to embracing each with many hugs, to exchanged a few words in Portuguese. Thank you Carol for reminding me to have a child like mind set when loving others. 

Day 2: Home visits. From house to house we would share the gospel and would offer prayer to people. Each household we visited loved to talk and visit with us, coffee was offered along with greetings of hugs and kisses. We ended the night with a giant christian dance party ‘giant meaning Tash, Eline, and I’. If only we knew 3 hours later half the team got the flu virus. From the stories I heard violently sick. (Praise God I slept through it) 

Day 3: Just like that h a l f of team brazil was sick and ended up leaving the next morning to return back to base. Plans changed all the time in brazil. At first Eline wanted everyone to return home, but God had other plans. Now the Holy Spirit came into this village. Breaking into smaller groups for house visiting I was the only green-go (white person) along with 3 other Brazilians. Now the fun stuff. My vision came true. Each house we attend I shared the gospel. The last home I attend hit the ‘home run’. Walking up to this house I felt something different a good different. As we entered the home we started to chat. The father of the household knew Jesus, but was thirsty for more. In this moment I shared my testimony and a man whom was handicapped started to cry. I asked if anyone wanted pray and this man looked me in the eyes and nodded. He wanted prayer to press on, to be strengthen so he could impact and strengthen others. After ending the prayer I felt the presence of God and the room felt lighter and brighter. 

Here's the photo of the family I had a vision of! How exciting to talk things of the Lord, and agreeing and releasing of prayer. The Kid in the Kiss shirt later came to talk to us on how to get involved in YWAM. 

Thinking to myself..wow this is what life is about. No mater what age, color, status, or language. At the end of the day we have the same wants/needs. To be loved, and that love come from Jesus. We as Christians carry his love, and carry that love to others. That my friends is called revival.  Walking home before 6 o clock (that’s when the snakes would come out) I had a HUGE smile on my face.The next morning we packed our things and heading back into the VW bus and returned back to base. I did it, I conquered the challenge and God showed up in a radical way. When you commit and say “Jesus here I am, send me” He does. It’s a dangerous prayer but that’s when heaven kisses earth. Amen?!

To know God

My adventure with Jesus has been one giant G L O R Y bomb! Exploding with tons of love, and break through.

|| Week 8_Co-Create_Joseph Avakian ||

Life is like a blank canvas. We have so many options and decisions on how to fill in the frame. Myself as a photographer I get to choose the subject in front of my lens. Yes I will make mistakes. Yes I will fail..and from every failure there’s a lesson that is taught. Joseph taught on his success with the Lord, and how simply he pulls Jesus into his art work. He taught us to co-create with God. How? Invite Him. Ask for ideas, ask to see what He wants you to see. Give me your eyes Jesus. This week has opened my eyes. Opened my eyes to dream big, and to capture the beauty this world has to offer. 

T U N E into His Voice

 

Week 9 & 10| Outreach training

In only 6 days, I’ll be leaving to Brazil.. wow. My lecture phase has flown by. Week 9 was cooperate week, were all the DTS came together. We learned how  to make disciples, and to keep the gospel simple. To Go, Gather, Pray, and Guide. || Cross Culture with Andrew + Terry York || This past week made me so pumped for Brazil. I learned much about culture and how my culture defines ‘who I am’. More importantly that “There is beauty in being different”-Terry York. They taught on how to respect others and how our comments is how we judge the culture. In the amidst of it all my heart is to honor and serve.

B.R.A.Z.I.L get ready, we are coming for you! 

Ask and you will receive

Each week I’ve asked the Lord to give me a word for that week. 


Week one: Receive. In the prayer room He whispered ‘receive’, over and over again. I asked receive what, receive what. Later in the week we had a prayer session for Philip Lin my DTS school leader. Long story short he came into class with crutches (the past 10 years he’s had multiple surgery on his right knee). We all joined together as a class, and prayed for a healing. Joy a women of God in my class, prayed out she also struggled with having bad knees. I felt the Holy Spirit (physically tugging from the inside) telling me to confess I have bad knees as well.  I felt released once I did..The Lord did a miracle on my Knees, I know he transformed my knees. HE HEALED ME! I know for a fact that HE strengthen my knees. After standing up and praying again for Philip I felt a numbness and shooting jolt go up my left leg. GO GOD! I know He wants me strong, and healthy for all the adventures and journeys He has for me. Lord you are the ultimate healer. To God be all the GLORY! 

1 Peter 2:24: He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.


Week two: Communicate. The prayer room is what I look forward to each week. It’s were I can feel Jesus and meet with Him face to face. He gave me the word communicate. He showed me my destiny, my ancestry. A flash of Morse code came to mind (the electricity running in my skull side to side, and front to back) making a Cross. He showed me the legacy that must live on! Did I mention how many goosebumps I had?! This week I’ve been needing to update to you all on how my time here in Kona has been amazing! So like above he told me to sit down and communicate with you guys.. aka my blog! Now that it is the weekend.. I have time to sit down and dedicate my time to you all! 

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1 day!

Today is my last full day in my little town of Medford, Oregon. Will I miss it? Of course, all my family and friends are here. On the sunny side I’ll be where my heart has longed to be. To be apart of being the hands and feet of Jesus, and I’m SO excited to see how He uses me. But..
Today marks a bittersweet day. I know I’m going to miss out on some key life milestones. The birth of my Niece, and one of my best friends wedding. Will I be back? Of Course! In order for me to Grow and to Love unconditionally. I know this is the path God has placed for me. I think goodbyes are sad and I’d much rather say hello. Hello to a new adventure! I love you all. I’ll keep
this blog up to date!

What defines us..

Isaiah 64:7 “You are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter: we are all the work of your hand ”.

And I sit here in my warm bed, I’m pondering and thinking about what’s ahead in the future. Now the Lord tells us to not worry, but my heart is worried for a loved one. The world tell us we are to define ourself, or worse yet we some how believe others can label us. Trick us into thinking something we aren’t. Why is it easy to label others? Does it makes us feel better about ourself. Maybe for a short amount of time. In this day and age we are living in the generation to ‘express’ yourself. Another 70’s movement.. Maybe.
What I’m trying to say is.. Don’t let the world get to you. Satan is alive and well In this world. But do you know our God is Greater our God is BIGGER than any problem. He knows the emptiness and degrading sin is, but yet He took His life for my sin. Wow.. Powerful.. How can I ever thank you?! By letting You use me. Today marks 10 now 9 days before I leave on my great and grand adventure. I know the Lord is using me to be a prayer warrior, and to show Gods grace by loving one another. Today has taught me: to love means to keep NO record of wrong. (1 Corinthian’s 13)
Let the Lord shape our life, most of the time I get molded out of place. But when I give my trust, hope, and faith in Him. He’ll hand craft my beautiful journey called life.

Xoxo
-Heather

Daily prayer

Father God, you are not interested in using the cleverest, wisest, most resourceful people, but you are interested in the willing and freely available. I want to make myself available to you, to be useful to you in whatever ways you see fit. Pour your love into me afresh today so I can share it with whomever you put in front of me. Amen. -Reckless devotion.